HOW TO TACKLE GRIEF AND LOSS
In this week’s Podcast Show with Amanda Ferret we discuss how to tackle Grief and Loss and if there is hope, if there is a chance to overcome the sadness and enjoy the journey.
“When we lose someone we love, we must learn not to live without them, but to live with the love they left behind”
What’s been lost, this Pandemic has been increasing since January 2020. One word to sum up the Pandemic is loss. Loss of freedom, loss of jobs, or careers, loss of human contact, loss of hugs, and loss of loved ones. How we cope with loss has not been easy this past year. Each culture or religion has different ways to cope with loss which has really put a wrench in the “normal ways” of both death, and celebrating loss. Which will come back to bite us in the a*s in year’s to come! And of course there are different losses.
A loss can be:
- Loss of a close friend
- Loss of a parent
- Loss of a partner
- Loss of a sibling
- Loss of a celebrity- can also affect us in uncertain ways
- Loss of a pet
- Loss of a job
- Loss of a marriage, divorce or separation
- Loss of a relationship
- Serious illness of a loved one
- Loss of a colleague
- Loss of your everyday abilities
- Loss of a business
- Loss of a family member, no communication
Before we can dive in and Look at How to Tackle Grief and Loss we must look at what is a Loss?
Loss is defined as having something or someone leave or be taken away from you, a feeling of grief when something is gone, or a decline in money. An example of loss is when your parent dies. An example of loss is when you are fired from your job. An example of loss is what you feel when your pet dies.
Love Love Nora McInerny!! I have all of her books on Grief and Loss and will list them down below as well.
There are different types of Losses
- Necessary Loss – This loss is when you lose something or someone that is replaced by something different or better, natural and positive part of life. A few examples would be when a child leaves home to go to college, or leaving behind family and friends to go on and make new friends and begin a career, leaving the nest!
- Actual Loss – This loss is when you can no longer touch, hear, see or what is no longer near them or near the object such as a building. People feel grief when a valued object becomes worn out, lost, stolen, or ruined by disaster. A few examples would be a body part, a pet, a friend, a life partner, or even a job
- Perceived Loss – a uniquely experienced loss by the grieving person and not really recognizable or obvious to others. The loss is very real to the griever. Some examples would be a high level achiever such as a 4.0 student attending nursing school and receiving a much lower letter grade than they are used to. Or a child feeling less loved by her parents and experiences a loss of self esteem which sometimes difficult to recognize.
- Maturational Loss – All losses from going through life with all types of normal day-to-day activities. A few examples would be- a Stay at home mom that is experiencing a child going to school for the first time. Or Widowed parents with only one child that is getting married- leaving you alone
- Situational Loss – loss occurring from unpredictable life event, that usually creates many other losses. A few examples would be: divorce creates loss of spouse, home, financial assistance, less time or no time with any of the children. Also, losing a job, creates loss of income, loss of self esteem for bread winner, stress, loss of home perhaps, loss of time with family and friends if you must take multiple lower paying jobs to supplement your income
- Stigmatized Loss – This loss has ties that bind these types of loss are the shame, guilt, or anger those left behind might feel and the reluctance to reach out for or accept support in their grief. When the death has an associated stigma we may experience additional layers of pain on our grief journey. Examples of stigmatized losses include HIV/AIDS, suicide, substance related causes, homicide and mental health issues.
- First and foremost, we want to remind you that grief is both universal and individual. There is no right way to grieve, but the way your person died is never a reason to ignore your own emotions and resist your experience of bereavement.
- Common examples of stigmatized loss include suicide, substance abuse-related deaths, and murder. The
- Ambiguous Loss – When a loved one is psychologically absent either emotionally or cognitively gone or missing from your life. A few examples would be divorce, adoption, and loss of physical contact with family and friends because of immigration.
But how do you Tackle the Grief and Loss? That is the big question, now that you have seen all of the types of Grief! Now to tackle the Grief and Loss through your mind, and outside support! Check out our Podcast on tips and tricks with this rollercoaster!
- The Emotional Rollercoaster
- Questioning Why?
- Spiritual Disillusionment
- How to Cope Day to Day
This is actually our new Normal during the Pandemic. It brings a whole other layer to our grieving. Which we will discuss further in our next Podcast.
AMANDA, a certified Emotional Wellness Counselor, EFT practitioner and speaker that focuses on emotional awareness and mastery, grief and loss, and radical self-chronic and mental illness and strives to be an ally, advocate, and accomplice, working to a create a world more accessible, just equitable and compassionate for all! Amanda’s healing journey was not an easy one. Losses continued and she battled with her own health and well-being. Amanda now takes life day by day with hope, grace and resilience, tackling each new challenge life presents! Amanda FERRAT Valeyourselfcounseling@gmail.com Www.valueyourselfcounseling.com Facebook: valueyourselfcounseling Instagram: @valueyourselfcounseling
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